Kateryna Bloherman: “Our whole life is a complete picture”

In a world where each of us is a projection of each other, frankness becomes a real luxury, first of all with ourselves. Today, on the birthday of our heroine, on the pages of BOMOND VIP, we present a new DIGITAL cover and an interview with Mrs. Kateryna Bloherman, a psychologist and practicing psychotherapist. In this conversation, we talked about integrity and the feminine state, about the combination of strength and sensitivity, therapy as a form of creativity, honest relations with ourselves and deep trust in life as a single process. About what really holds when roles disappear, and how to learn to see your own life not as fragments, but as a whole picture.

“A woman is a very special substance. I would compare a woman to a state.

The condition is something gentle, fragile, almost weightless, but no less tangible, deep and meaningful"...

...Mrs. Kateryna, I want to start our conversation with these words of yours. Tell me, please, what is a woman in the modern world in your vision? How can it preserve this inner fragility without losing strength?

For me, a modern woman is integrity, which manifests itself in the ability to subtly feel and allow herself the freedom to live ambivalent and paradoxical states. This is a woman who is not afraid of her own multi-layeredness and knows how to live in it naturally, without the need to simplify herself for the world.

It can be sharp and soft, proactive and tired, strong and vulnerable on the same day. Sometimes even at the same minute.

Fragility is not about weakness, but about the ability to be honest with yourself. Be aware of where it hurts you, what moves you, what scares you.

And it is in this contact and closeness with oneself that a powerful force is born - not from armor, but from the courage to manifest itself alive.

The world today requires speed, decisions, action. At the same time, you talk about sensation, awareness, softness. How to learn to combine these two poles - action and state, strength and sensitivity?

Just like we can breathe. We do not exhale without inhalation and vice versa.

Action without a pause exhausts, a pause without action stops.

For me, the combination of strength and sensitivity begins with the understanding that this is not a contradiction, but two parts of the whole. A force without sensitivity becomes a rigidity that removes us from ourselves. And sensitivity without strength is tenderness, which has nothing to rely on to translate it into action. But together they form a very precise direction: I move because I feel and feel to move correctly. This is not a balance that must be maintained - it is an internal dialogue that must be learned to conduct with oneself.

Every story has its beginning ...What was your first chapter to the role of a psychologist and Gestalt psychotherapist? Why did this sphere conquer your heart?

My story started long before school. I was a child who was very interested in the inner world of people, their behavior and noticed subtle things that most people do not even pay attention to.

When I shared my deep and detailed self-esteem of any personal relationships with loved ones, I often encountered a reaction of sincere surprise - it was unusual for people to see how meticulously, detailed and subtly observed internal processes. Over time, I felt that this ability was not an accident, but my natural vocation and gift, which gently led me to my profession.

When I first got into the Gestalt space, I had a feeling of home - you can be more than real, here they notice and appreciate what is happening inside, and not what we are used to showing on the outside.

This sphere conquered my heart, because it not only brought me back to me - it made my “I” deeper, more voluminous, more real.

In your practice there is a concept of “emotional-figurative therapy”. It sounds very artistic, in my opinion, almost like an elusive connection between art and psychology. Let us learn more about this method. Are the emotions and inner experiences of a person really expressed through images: imaginary pictures, sensations, symbols?

I will say more, all therapy in general is about creativity. In my opinion, a person with only potential and love for creativity can be a smart therapist.

Emotional-image therapy works with how our psyche draws experiences. Sometimes it is difficult to describe an emotion in words, but the image appears immediately. And when we start working with this image, it reveals what has been waiting for attention inside for a long time.

People often think that "right words" are needed for therapy, but the subconscious speaks to us much more interestingly.

When a person describes his condition as a "fog", the "stone in the chest" is not just metaphors, but a door to a deeper understanding of what is happening. Images allow you to quickly get to the point, bypassing the protective reactions of the psyche, which sometimes only confuse.

The most interesting thing is that when we interact with this image in the therapeutic process and the image is transformed, the state of a person also changes.

Here is such an inner creativity that helps to heal.

It's a very fast and at the same time deep way to touch yourself.

Today I would also like to raise the topic of relationships. However, not only those who are born between two people, but those that we build with ourselves in the first place. How do you think a healthy relationship with yourself begins? And what, in your opinion, most often prevents a person from seeing deep love and acceptance in himself?

A healthy relationship with yourself begins with honesty with yourself.

From a simple look inside: how do I really? What's wrong with me now?

Many people do not even know how to answer such simple questions and avoid relationships with themselves. We are afraid to see uncertainty, fatigue, anger, powerlessness, shame.

But true self-love does not begin where we are perfect, but where we are real.

Most often, a person is disturbed by an excessive internal critic, who for years

Explained that "you are not enough".

Controlling it and being able to turn it on only where it is really needed is already therapy.

Hearing yourself under him is the beginning of a relationship.

I propose now to imagine that you and I are somewhere on the seashore ... And we have many postcards that we will send to every woman on the planet. What message would you write?

My message would be short: “Everything is one.”

And I would put a very deep meaning into these words.

Everything has a higher plan, and our whole life is a complete picture. If you look at only individual events, perception can be distorted, and it may seem that something is not going as desired. But if you look at life in general as a canvas, you can see that everything is happening for the better - to fulfill your mission and realize your deepest desires.

It is important to learn to ask yourself the question not "for what?", but "for what?".

From the point of view of the Gestalt approach, it is also about human integrity and trust in the world.

When we perceive ourselves and the world not as separate parts, but as a single field of interaction, a special inner peace is born in us.

And it is from this sense of integrity that trust arises: trust in processes, in life, in the world around us.

Then there is more joy, lightness and support inside - not because "everything is fine", but because I am in contact with myself and the world as a single, whole system.

Another additional meaning of the message "all is one" can be traced in the commandment "love your neighbor as yourself". This is actually a very complex commandment, and it is the process of its implementation that can even become the meaning of life.

First you need to love yourself, and this is much harder than it seems. By "love" I mean acceptance, care, warmth to yourself, the ability to be on your side in any situation.

And only then the second stage opens: the opportunity to love another and see in him a part of his reflection, his projections. To make this possible, it is important to learn to see voluminously and objectively, to develop empathy and compassion for another person.

And finally comes the understanding that we are all projections of each other, and we are truly one whole.

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